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[Wednesday] I can't even look at you without falling in love with you over and over again. I wonder why you like me and how serious you are, but I shouldn't. I'm scared of what I've gotten into. Three days without you and that has been making my head shake comment

[Saturday] While driving home i realized that there are a lot of things i need to say to you that i cant say to you in person. What am I leaving? No job, more friends than I realized, a history of ups and downs. I don't know, I know you wont read this. I hope you're aware (which I think you are) that I am SO proud of you. It breaks my heart to see you look back on your life and not yet be satisfied, but you will be. Never have I gotten so attached or been so honest. Please, sweep those piles far from your feet and don't forget about me, ok? Because where ever you end up, remember that someone wished it upon you because of the difference you made. Keep being yourself, your amazing, loving, silent self and I promise you that I will stay me. comment

[Sunday] loneliness isn't being alone.... Never been so comfortable with someone so myself and thats all it is it's driving me nuts not to tell you that i love you in the morning. comment

[Tuesday] Despite how shitty things and people can be, (catty, restless, obnoxious, sketchy), some parts of life are actually good. California and counting. Waiting for 1 am tomorrow. comment

[Monday] See if I give a fuck! Look at that, we have journal entries about the same person! But somehow you were the one who asked me out last summer.... I thought you were a lesbian? I thought you had ring worm? if that's what you're going to pick over your friends, fine. Never talk shit to my friends ever again about "never using their brain" because obviously, you don't either. I am now exponentially hung over and have to go take some finals. Okay with me. comment

[Friday] I guess I crossed the line somewhere between holding your hand and having your fingers on the back of my neck. comment

[Monday] And I guess that's how I felt. That if anyone knew how a relationship would end, people would never date anyone. But who is using who? Honestly I can't remember. Now my dog is in the hospital. And apparently I have no friends. And that is why this post is for you. Who else could it be for? I am tired of the same-ol' same-ol' and the public displays of affection. But I like seeing you and only because of your convenience. That's how I still feel. Synagogues in spring And why is the grass so green? With a taste of wine My haiku of the day. read (1) comment

[Sunday] Where do I tell you that I can't do this anymore? I surely can't do it to your face. comment

[Monday] Ahhh, this is the first time I've been sober all week. I'm running low on baby-sitter fluid. "It's nothing to worry about, it's just poetry." I'm going to soak my cut-up feet in the salty river. Where is summer? I'm in limbo. read (6) comment

[Thursday] I don't recall sleep. I woke up awake laying beside you on the side of the bed that I don't find comfort in. I can still see the stains. I packed my things and left. Laid awake all day. My head hurts. Is the week over yet? This week has been so strange and not like me. comment

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